I trace the things on your desk with my finger: the blue Bic pen, the loose pay
stub, the nickel and two pennies (your lucky seven
cents), the seam of your leather wallet and the silver teeth on your keys.
These things strewn on your desk are talismans in which I store my gratitude, the keys
to secure our happy togetherness. Of course, you don’t know this: I pay
for your loyalty to me in silent matins and vespers as I trace. Somehow these seven
personal effects garner power over us, like seven
stoic judges presiding at your desk, or back-up keys
to the room that houses the delicious magic that brought you to me: I can’t afford not to pay.
You see, only after I pay will the seven talismans guarantee me your heart. That’s what’s in it for me: your key.
*This tritina is brought to you by Rowan. She gave me the words seven, pay, and key. See below for other tritinas by my friends.
Want to give one a try? Give us a shout in the coffeehouse and we’ll give you three words. In the meantime, check out the other tritinas this week!
Mojave (hold, fire, drive)
The Farmer’s Wife and the Crow (crow, sorrow, secret)
Striations (silver, touch, ease)
Excavation (mine, treasure, keep)
Lunch Date (mark, steal, lie)
Trying to Tritina (fair, gold, spun)
Flip Of a Coin (run, coin, fly)
24 thoughts on “Superstition”
Thank you, Joan. Just got done reading your turmeric story. Hilarious!
Thanks! Glad you liked it 🙂
I like the way you used the form’s repetition of words to show the character’s compulsive nature.
Thanks, Cyn. That was the only way I could qualm my heebie jeebies about repeating the same words so much.
Nicely done, Nate!
I’m not religious, nevertheless, I’ve been known to hold on to very silly superstitions. (always for love : )
Wow. Not only did you deftly work those 3 words (seven!?) but you also seamlessly included the prompt question. I love the idea of superstitiously holding onto talismans in the hope that everything will turn out right.
man, seven is a tough word to work with. you nailed it though. well done!
This works really well, Nate.
Superstition, to me, is always a peculiar yet fascinating thing. And seven always seems to be a prevalent number. But I could feel the sentiment in the tracing of the talismans, the everyday objects that meant so much more.
This was really lovely. I loved the sentiment behind their talismans, and as someone who has their own share of tokens, I could relate on a personal level to having emotions tied up in the act of touching the things of their loved.
This is just great, Nate!
I love the details in your tritina. I can just see everything (well, except for whether or not this person is in love or a psychopath!).
Hahaha. I was worried I might be crossing the line, but I hope it’s clear that the narrator already has the love of the other person. They are just trying to hold on to it.
1. I learned a new word from this post: matins.
2. I love this idea, and I can picture the scene clearly in my head.
Nice work, friend.